Scott Slute 3/14/22 Scott Slute 3/14/22

Local Man Stops Using Russian Dressing In His Reuben Sandwiches In Support Of Ukrainian People

Scott Slute 3/13/22 Scott Slute 3/13/22

Mennonite Man Smuggly Drives Past Gas Station

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MLSE Strongly Recommends Leafs Fans Continue To Wear Paper Bag Over Their Face

Scott Slute 3/11/22 Scott Slute 3/11/22

Province Sees A Miraculous Mass Curing Of Made-Up Medical Exemptions

Scott Slute 3/9/22 Scott Slute 3/9/22

Ontario Set To Eliminate Hand Washing By End Of Month

Scott Slute 3/9/22 Scott Slute 3/9/22

Everyone Forgot It Was Toronto’s Birthday On Sunday And Now We Feel Bad

Scott Slute 3/8/22 Scott Slute 3/8/22

NASA Scientists Discover Queen Street West Brandy Melville Lineup Is Visible From Outer Space

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Trudeau Blows Off Meeting With French President To Go Surfing

Scott Slute 3/7/22 Scott Slute 3/7/22

How Does This Millennial Afford Gas? His Parents Bought Him A Gas Station

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Drake Offers To Buy City Of Toronto

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Gas Prices In Toronto Rise To One Human Kidney

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Freedom Convoy Supporters Eagerly Await Instructions On Whether To Support Russia Or Ukraine

Scott Slute 3/2/22 Scott Slute 3/2/22

Ontario Lifts Restrictions On Screaming At The Top Of Your Lungs While Working Out

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Covid Enjoys One Last Hurrah Before Going Away Tomorrow

Scott Slute 2/27/22 Scott Slute 2/27/22

UN Reminds Russian Soldiers To Wear Properly Fitted Face Masks While Engaging In War Crimes

Scott Slute 2/26/22 Scott Slute 2/26/22

Celebrities Threaten Putin With Another Rendition Of “Imagine”

Scott Slute 2/25/22 Scott Slute 2/25/22

Tim Horton’s Announces Second Wave Of Ice Cream Flavours: “Burnt Roast” “Mom of 3's Cigarette Cup” and “Lots O’Butter”

Scott Slute 2/24/22 Scott Slute 2/24/22

BREAKING: France Surrenders